Sensitive Boy

Bohdin was super excited to go to soccer practice last week.  He is really enjoying the new session.  Practice went well until it was time for a water break.  Bohdin came up to me after getting a drink.  He was crying because a boy had pushed him out of the way.  I hugged him and he went back out in a few seconds.  Toward the end of practice they split into teams.  The girl was on the same team as Bohdin so I knew they would do awesome.  Bohdin had a goal and also an assist.  The assist was more of a lucky accident but it was really cool.  The girl was further away from the group and when Bohdin kicked it out of the gaggle of boys she had a clear shot for the goal.  Soccer practice ended after that goal.  Bodhin walked over to one of the coaches and as he was walking a boy came over and pushed Bohdin from behind.  Bohdin was really sad.  It was the second boy who had pushed him that day.  The coach talked to the boy and made him apologize.  Bohdin was sad even as we loaded up into the car.  It's not fair that this should happen to him.  He's so gentle and kind.  The next day I was looking stuff up and came across a book about the highly sensitive boy.  It described Bohdin really well.   

What is the difference between a non-highly sensitive boy and a sensitive boy? A highly sensitive boy has trouble screening out stimuli and can be easily overwhelmed by noise, crowds and time pressure. The HSB (highly sensitive boy) tends to be very sensitive to pain and violent movies. He is also made extremely uncomfortable by bright lights, strong smells and changes in his life.
The highly sensitive boy’s nervous system is "wired" in such a way that he is more acutely aware of, and attuned to, themselves, other people, and their environment than the non-HSB. As a result, a highly sensitive boy is more easily stimulated by his surroundings. This is an inborn trait that researchers have also observed in approximately 20 percent of animal populations.
The highly sensitive boy generally reacts more deeply and exhibits more emotional sensitivity than the non-HSB. However, the degree of emotional and physiological reactions varies in each boy. For example, one HSB may not be bothered by noise or crowds, but is made uncomfortable by strong smells or wearing scratchy fabrics. Another boy may be extremely disturbed by loud noise, but not be bothered by watching violence on television. Although the trait has a high correlation with introversion, approximately 30 percent of HSBs are extraverts.
Most sensitive boys tend to pause to reflect before acting and would not be considered risk takers. Although this could be considered having a healthy caution, in most societies boys are frequently encouraged and praised for taking risks and shamed for cautious behavior. The HSB will notice potential danger sooner than the non-HSB and is very aware of safety issues.
Sensitive boys are generally less aggressive than the “average” boy and are at the opposite end of the spectrum from the very unemotional, aggresive, risk-taking non-HSBs. The HSB is conscientious, sensitive to his environment, and socially aware of others around him.
Although many cultures tend to categorize sensitive boys as being unusual or not normal, the trait is basically neutral. Life can be both satisfying and challenging for the boy with a finely tuned nervous system. For example, his responsible and careful approach to completing his schoolwork can make him an excellent student. However, he may spend an inordinate amount of time agonizing over whether he completed his assignment properly.

The problem is that our society does not care for these types of boys.  They are well regarded in other parts of the world but unfortunately for Bohdin he lives in this country.  Buddy and I will have to help Bohdin work with his personality.

On the way home from soccer practice I tried really hard to keep Nyla awake.  She doesn't really take naps anymore because if she does she is up way too late.  Since Bohdin was sad I tried to lighten the mood by talking about vacation plans.  We'll have to go somewhere for our anniversary this year.  Bohdin wanted to go to Hawaii which would be nice but is out of the question.  The kids finally settled on a hotel on the beach.  I'm hoping they will forget by the time summer rolls around because it is highly unlikely that we will be going to the beach.  Nyla just walked into the bedroom packed and ready to go.  She is wearing a bathrobe, pumpkin bag on her head, backpack and is carrying an additional bag filled with clothes.

Cora is opposed to me writing such a long post.  She's a little fussy this morning.  Last night her first tooth broke through.  Well it may have happened any time yesterday but I discovered it last night.  I hope she's fussy from the tooth and not because she is getting sick.  Bohdin was pretty sick yesterday.  He had a high fever through most of the day.  We lost our thermometer.  I bought one last night and checked his temperature as he came up to dinner.  He was playing fisherman and wanted the tent set up.  His temp was 102.1.  I joked with Buddy that if either of us had that kind of temperature we would be laying in bed moaning about being sick.  I can't imagine what his temperature must have been like earlier when he had no energy and wouldn't eat.